Who taught you how to pray?  Long before we ever went to school, many of us were taught how to pray from our parents, or grandparents, or a close family friend or relative.  And what we were probably taught first was the Lord’s Prayer There are great stories about children learning the Lord’s Prayer.  There’s the one about the little boy who used to say ‘Our Father, who art in heaven, Howard be thy name!” This kid thought God’s name was Howard!  Or the three years old who ended the Lord’s Prayer with, “…but deliver us some email, Amen”.  When I was a child living on Long Island, I thought the words said, “And lead us not into Penn Station…”! It’s not always easy learning to pray!

In this morning’s gospel, we hear one of Jesus’ disciples ask Jesus to teach them to pray.  The passage opens by saying, “He was praying in a certain place…”  The disciples have witnessed Jesus praying They have witnessed his connection with God that is intimate and intense.  And they want that, too. I remember being single in my twenties, and seeing couples who had great marriages --  they were very connected to each other, had meaning and purpose in their lives, were very connected and yet still strong individuals  I remember thinking to myself, “I want that.”  So I would talk with these couples and ask them how they did it?  What could they recommend, what could they teach me so that, when it came time to choose my life partner, we could have a marriage that was intimate and meaningful? I got some great advice along the way!  I think that is what the disciples are doing in this gospel passage.  They see Jesus praying and they think to themselves, “I want that, too -- I want that kind of intimate connection to God.  How do I get that?”  So they ask Jesus to teach them how to do it -- how to pray like he prays.  The mistake we make when we look at this passage is to think that Jesus just gave them these words, like they were magic -- “just say these words and you’ll find God!”  What Jesus gave them -- and gives us -- is not just words, but a template for spiritual health.  He told them,”If you want to be connected to God in a deep way, try this stance toward life -- try living and being like this…”   There are six rules in the Lord’s prayer that Jesus gives us for spiritual health.

Rule #1 -- God is intimate. The first thing Jesus tells them to say is, “Father”.   The actual word used in the original Scripture is “Abba”.  “Abba” was a term of endearment and affection and intimacy It would be like saying, “Da-da” or “Daddy” or “Papa”.  What Jesus is inviting them to is real intimacy with God.  This was not a very common view of god.  In the Old Testament, there are only 14 references to God as “Father”.  the traditional God-view was not of a loving, compassionate God who is intimately involved in your life.  The more common view of God would have been as an omnipotent, all powerful God who could be fickle and vengeful.  He was to be appeased.  Jewish people would offer their sacrifices to God so as to get God to leave them alone.  “If I give you this, will you leave the rest of my life alone?”  Jesus is talking about a very different idea of God.  He is talking about a God who can be trusted to do what is best for us at all times, no matter what life throws at us.  A God who has every hair on our heads counted. After he teaches the disciples how to pray, Jesus tells two stories to reinforce this idea of God as unconditionally loving, wanting what is best for us, even more than a loving parent wants for their child First and foremost, Jesus tells us, and the relationship with God is personal.  It’s intimate.  So approach it that way. And don’t give up.  Be persistent.  Find what works for you.  If the idea of God as father doesn’t necessarily work for you, consider God as mother, or nana, or grandpa, or any other relationship that speaks to care and compassion and unconditional love for you. Ask God to give you an image or concept that helps you understand the depth of intimacy and love that God feels for you.  That is the idea Jesus wants us to start with.

Rule # 2 -- Know your place in the universe. Or as Jesus puts it: “hallowed (or holy) be your name.”  Jesus tells us that a primary ingredient to spiritual health is acknowledging that God is God and we are not.  So much of our conflict and anxiety and fear in life comes out of the need to be the one in control (I speak here from first hand experience!).  God has given us free will, and so there are many things that we are free to choose, many things that we can control about our lives.  But the cosmic things, like life and death issues, issues of loss, and the fact that life is constantly changing, whether we like it or not, these are not in our control.  These are part of the human condition. We will all experience them at one time or another in our lives.  An important part of spiritual health is embracing our limitedness as humans, and starting to trust that we are part of something much bigger than we are, and that it is good and sacred.  We may not always understand it, but we believe that this sacred goodness is at the heart of all creation. 

Rule #3 -- Be open to another way, not just your way.  Or in Jesus‘words: “your kingdom come” A huge part of spiritual health is living into the kingdom of God.  Throughout the Scriptures, Jesus tells us that God’s view of life and how the world should be is very different than humanity’s view.   Jesus tells us of a kingdom where everyone matters, no one is marginalized.  A kingdom where no one is left out, all are included and welcomed. A kingdom where God’s grace and love and forgiveness are abundant and never ending, and where our ability to love and forgive are limitless. When we are spiritually healthy we are able to say to God, “Today, all that I do will be for the good of YOUR kingdom, not just the good of ME.”  When we pray, we ask God to allow the kingdom, to allow love and acceptance and forgiveness and inclusion and compassion to come into this world, and help me be a part of bringing it to those I meet. When we pray “your kingdom come“, we move from our tendency to just ask for things to enlarging our hearts to expect something bigger to come.

Rule #4 -- Don‘t be greedy. Or as Jesus says:  “Give us this day our daily bread”. For the Jews in ancient Israel, this was a literal prayer.  Hunger was a huge threat.  Jesus tells them to ask God to give them the food they need for the day, so they won’t be consumed with worry or fear about whether they will get what they need. It was a reference back to the Israelites in the desert and the manna that God sent.  Manna was bread that only lasted for a day.  If you tried to hoard it, it became rancid and filled with worms. What God gives is manna, enough for the day For us in the 21^st century first world, hunger is not a reality.  But our physical needs are a reality What this prayer teaches us is to ask God for enough, and no more.  This is a really hard prayer for Americans. We are taught to always want more.  There’s never enough.  To pray for enough is very counter cultural.  Because when everyone has “enough” -- enough food, enough education, enough healthcare, -- then everyone has equal access to the world’s gifts.  When we desire enough rather than more, we become more able to bring the kingdom into the world.  We become more aware of those who do not have enough, more compassionate to their plight.  We become more generous with what we have, and more desirous of sharing our good fortune with others.  We live life with open hands of hospitality, rather than with clenched hands that hoard.  When we pray “give us this day or daily bread”, we ask God for enough, for the wisdom to know what enough is, and the compassion to help others get enough for them.

Rule #5 -- Be reconciled to God, ourselves and others. Or in Jesus’ words:  “Forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who have sinned against us.”  This point is worthy of a whole sermon all to itself.  But here’s the bottom line -- there is no spiritual health without reconciliation.   We need to able to ask for forgiveness of God and others when we have offended them.  And we need to be able to offer forgiveness when we have been wronged.  Easier said than done.  Probably the two most popular weapons we humans use to protect ourselves from being hurt is pride and grudges.  If we hold onto our pride and never admit we’re wrong, no one can get to us.  When we refuse to forgive, keep a tally of all the wrongs done to us, hold a grudge no matter how much energy it takes, then that person will never be able to hurt us again.  But the truth is that nothing hurts us more than holding on to anger and hurt.  Desmond Tutu put it best.  He said, “Refusing to forgive is like drinking poison and expecting your enemy to die.”  We need to be reconciled to God and to each other for our spirits to be truly healthy.

Rule #6 -- Ask for help.  Or as Jesus put it:  “Save us from the time of trial”.  The opening line of M. Scott Peck’s bestseller “The Road Less Traveled” says simply this: “Life is difficult” Anyone worth their salt knows how true this can be. Life can be difficult We need help at those times.  We can’t go it alone.  We are not islands We need to be able to ask God for the help we need to face the difficult things in life.  We need to be open to the help of others to see us through.  When we cut ourselves off from that help, we shrivel inside.  It can be very hard to be the person receiving rather than giving.  But unless we have a balance of giving and asking for help, we will not experience spiritual health.